Hey :)

OMG, so many followers! That's amazing! I promise I won't let you guys down!
Anyways! Here's an update about everything how it is going...

I graduated esthetics school and now I am going to get my license for it. It was very intense and crazy since I was going full time to school and working part time. Honestly it was worth it! I learned a lot and somehow my ability to communicate got better, and I am not as afraid of physical contact with strangers anymore [don't be pervs! lol]
I am looking forward in sharing my knowledge and findings about skin care in here now as well. :) Or whatever you guys would like me to talk about...
But also having that personal lifestyle exposed can be a little bit spicy and interesting too lol

Hmmmmmm...
Well, it's been 9 months since I broke up with my ex and was posting a bunch of depressive things in here. I think everyone ends up being a little bit sad for a break up, but then we look back and see how much we learned. There are plenty of fish out there, and if you keep yourself open you will see that you CAN and WILL find someone that makes you happy. Just give it some time.
I am still single -seeing someone- and honestly it gets to me once in a while, but I can say I am happy. I made lots of friends at work and outside at work as well, I talk to everyone, and I feel good about it.
I don't miss HIM, I just miss what we had, afterall all girls like to be all fluffy and cute with someone we like, right? But these things I guess we just have to let it happen by itself...
Sometimes I wonder if I am too cold or something. A costumer at work once said I am intimidating because I can express confidence and being independent. It's a good trait, of course, but I don't want to feel like I am the man of the relationship. Also, it's funny that when I had someone everyone was kinda single, and now that I am the single one, everyone has a boyfriend/girlfriend lol FML!
Thankfully though, there are no asshole/jerks in my life!!!!! ♥ I like sweet guys~

Work has been amazing, I learned so much more about makeup and also skin care, we usually get reps to come over and talk to costumers, so I always end up having a little chat with them, also networking is a big plus if you want to be able to make things a little bit easier for you in the long run.
I want to start putting a portfolio together, but I feel like I am not prepared for it somehow.. we will see what I can do in the beginning of the year...
Also I am planning in start massage therapy school... It's funny that when you say that everyone starts to talk about their body aches... *sigh* lol

I am also back to youtube, it was fun but somehow I feel lazy about it... meh!

Any suggestions about a topic I can talk about?

Missed you guys!
xoxo

Just some thoughts...

Hey guys :)

I feel like this blog is becoming more of a journal than anything else. I really hope you guys don't mind to have such a mixed range of topics in here. If you want I can make it more of beauty related and create a new blog for these personal things.

I'm back to YouTube and it makes me feel really good about it. I just need to catch up. I have been working 30 hours a week, and looking to a new job, and starting Esthetics school next month, I am so excited!!!! 

And thanks for 23 followers! I feel like I felt when I started YouTube, just wish that we could reply to comments in an easier way. But I really appreciate all the support I get from all of you.
Sometimes is funny how we can talk to people that we acutally see everyday, but never really goes anywhere, other than routine talking... Then you are online, and you can relate a lot more to people you never saw in front of you. Or maybe we just feel safer to open up to people that can't really judge you?

Anyways...
Lately I have been paying a lot more attention to relationships. I guess it is because I'm turning 22 soon and I don't really see what I will end up doing. I just don't wanna be a 35 year old, never married and only with failure relationships. But at the same time I am not sure if I am really ready for a serious one, however, I already know that if it is not going to be a serious, dedicated one, I rather stay single.

I see that almost all my high school friends, and even friends from Brasil are already married, or are engaged. It makes me wonder sometimes if I deserve it or not. I mean, even tho I was dating for over two years, he never even bothered giving me flowers, we never had anything romantic, unless it was me doing... Lies! When he officially asked me out, he took me to dinner in a Japanese restaurant, that was the first month we were dating, it was a really cool day... I guess those two years was just hoping for another day like that. I am not going to say we didn't have cute days, but nothing really like a romantic grown up thing...

Most of the time I would think that I didn't deserve it, or wasn't good enough for that. But to be honest, I think I am a good girlfriend, the thing is... he wasn't the one.
I'm not 100% sure if I am ready to go into something right now.

Also lately I have been feeling a little disposable. I always meet people when they are broken or something happens. Once they are back on their feet, it seems like they forget who was by their side when they were shattered. My entire life was like that, somehow people trust me very easily with their feelings, but then they go away. Maybe is my fault? I don't like to think it is, after all I care about them.

Sometimes people ask me why do I want to be a make-up artist or why do I bother with so many broken people, and I my answer is that I just want people to feel pretty, even tho it is covered by a layer of colors, or by having someone to listen to them. I know it is two different questions, but the answer is the same. I guess I feel like people are challenging, and I will be there to help them face their fears, so I don't have to face my own. Since I can't feel good about how I look or things I feel, I don't want  others feel the same way, I want to see them happy! But I don't really let anyone in, or trust myself... I guess I have serious self image issues and low self esteem, even tho is not really out there for people to see it.

Anyways, this post is getting too long and boring.

:) I hope you guys have a good day!
xoxo,

Still needs a title.

So, another "relationship" updating post I guess?

It's been over a month already. I don't cry as much anymore, or think of him the same way I used to. Just to think about him with another girl would kill me, now I know this is going to happen eventually, but somehow those years together will always be in his mind. Hopefully in a good way.

I think that I tried to do what everyone thinks is the best to do after a break up. I changed my hair back to blonde, I am trying to go back to Tight Lacing (I will be posting my progress once I start again, hopefully by Sunday.), going out a lot more than I used to, started to drink more too... But to be honest, no matter what you do, the number of guys you add to your phone and talk to, friends you go out with, ranging as much as you want, you will only find peace once you let it go.

I was talking to someone and I think I was trying too hard to see him as my ex-boyfriend, and of course they are different persons with different personality, so I guess I ended up hurting myself and I don't know if I did anything to him. I think he just wanted to get into my panties anyways lol

So I guess there are two more lessons I learned since everything happened.
1. Once you break up, don try to see your ex in someone else, IS NOT GONNA HAPPEN.
2. YOU WILL ATTRACT A SHIT TON OF ASSHOLES!

So keep that in mind!

I understand that most all of us girls, wants to love and be loved no matter what. Someone to share our days with, to text when we wake up, to talk to until late hours on the phone, to tease and please us. Meeting nice and responsible guys nowadays sounds so hard. So be careful with random weird jerks out there.

It is better to be broken than to break ♥

xoxo

Stefy

No matter what, be strong!

I have been listening to this song all time... makes me happy! Hope you guys like it too!

So... it's been almost two weeks since I broke up with my loved one.... I spoke with him twice since the fact happened. It made me feel more and more depressed. For the couple of days I didn't eat properly, I was staying in bed until 1..2 pm, watching TV and going to work, have some drinks and going back to bed.
However, yesterday I was working, and one of my co-workers said that one of her friends, that she was going out with, couldn't make it, and asked if I wanted to go, and I said yes. So I texted one of my friends and said I was going out with her, and he asked if I was going to meet some cutie, and I said that "No men at the moment". Then he replied to me "Now I understand why you are so sad...you are afraid of being alone. Being single does not mean that you don't have anyone to talk to at 2 am, no one to call or do things with. You have friends that care about you, and would do anything to make you smile" That was a long ass text message, but it made me realize the truth. I have always been scared of having a broken heart, to be made fun of, to let my guard down for once. I always feared that people would make fun of me, or not find me interesting enough, so I never let anyone in. Losing my boyfriend was looking like the end of the world to me.

I miss him a lot, everyday to be honest. I miss our routine... after all it's been 2 yrs and a half together. I have been wanting to send him one last email but I didnt want to send something sad, or with mixed feelings, I wanted to send something positive, without being fake. And I just did that, and I am proud to say that I wrote a gigantic ass email with a smile on my face.
Even if he never comes back to me, I can rest today knowing that HE knows what this relationship meant, how much he made me grow, and that i will never forget what happened between us. I told him that it was up to you, he doesnt have to talk to me if he doesnt want to, nor accept me back... But my heart still open, until when? I dont know...

In the end, the message I learned today, and wanted to show to others is pretty simple and easy to understand, most of us get it figured out, but when it happens to us, we feel so lost!

Do not be afraid of being single, because it does not mean that you are alone. Even with a broken heart, you need to see that sometimes things are not meant to be. But if you believe that it is worth it, try it one more time. However, a relationship does not depend entirely on you; learn how to understand that people have their own opinions too...
Love is the most amazing and crazy feeling someone can feel, makes you happy, makes you wanna "die".

Sugar Pill! ♥

Hello everyone!


Leaving the sadness aside for a little bit... I'm here to talk about Sugar Pill. I already had the pressed shadows and did a review on my Youtube Chanel, if you guys are interested in watching it.
Recently they did a 20% off sale, and I got some of the pigments they sell. Sadly the beautiful red one called Asylum was out of stock :(
I sent some pigments to friends and they loved it as well. It is a company that I highly recommend and believe it has great potential.
I got 8 pigments, and I believed I paid $72 with free shipping! Great deal huh?

Founded by Amy Doan, Sugarpill is a custom cosmetics line specializing in vibrant, richly pigmented, luxury pressed eyeshadows, sparkling loose powders, and ultra dramatic false eyelashes.

Website	http://www.sugarpill.net

(Taken from their facebook fanpage)

Overall Experience: 8.5 out of 10

Pros:

- Extremely fast shipping! I seriously was surprised of how fast they came.

- The price is great for the amount of product you obtain, however....* (see cons)

- Lovely customer service.

- Great facebook page.

- Vegan, not tested in animals.

- Flat rate shipping, or the option of free shipping once certain amount is expend worldwide.

- Easy to use website.

- Durable/ custom made jars.

- Cutest packing in the world!

- Visible information.

- Can be used wet.

- Free sample with purchase.

Cons:

- * Some jars came with a LOT less product than others. They do the jars by weight, since some pigments ARE heavier than others, you will have less product on certain pigments.

- No filter = messy.

- You NEED something to stick the pigments with (primer/base) otherwise it looks very sheer-ish.

- They do not have an option for samples only.

- Might take a while to have products back in stock.

- They just came out with new colors, but there's a lack of options.

Magentric

Darling

Stella (I wish the camera would have gotten more details of the holographic glitter)

Weekender

Magpie

Royal Sugar

Lumi

Decora

 

It's been a long time...

Well, I have been wanting to make videos or write here for a while, I have so much to say. Sadly a lot of things have been happening in my life right now. As I said, I don't want to make this blog only for makeup. It's a bit personal too...
I have been through some very shitty times. I feel like I lost almost everything that meant the world to me. And I guess I am scared to start over, or at least not ready for it.

It's funny how we meet someone, all the sudden they are part of you, of your days... then they are gone.
Tomorrow is going to be one week since I broke up with someone I thought it was the one. We didn't fight, we both agreed that sadly the conditions we were going through couldn't do anymore. I guess that makes this incident harder on me. I still have huge feelings for this person, and no motives to say "screw him". Everyday when I wake up I wish I could read a "good morning" message or log into my facebook and see a link to a video with a song. When I come home from work I don't have anyone to send a message to. I don't have my bed flooded with teddy bears, my desk doesn't have pictures... it feels empty. 
I have been crying a lot, but somehow I am learning to be stronger. I approached some old friends too, some people I started a new friendship. It will take time to heal, and I am trying to be strong. Honestly I didn't expect to be on my feet again after two years in a half with him.

I haven't even put makeup on my face lately, I have eaten like a fat cow, and my room is messy... ah, I also shopped like crazy. Gladly everything still have tags, so over the weekend I have a lot of returns to do.
As of my eating, I am going to go back to healthy habits, meaning sleep around 1:00 -1:30 (since I work at night, I can't go to bed around 11-ish), eating well, going to the gym.

In may I am going to start an Esthetics course. Wish me luck!
Also starting college in September, I still don't know if I should go for fashion design or interior design.

Here's one of my favorite songs, hope you guys like it! ♥

Sorry for being so distant from everyone. I promise to make it up to you!

Lauren Luke - My Vintage Glams Pallet review

So! Here's my first beauty related post. It is going to be a review on the "My Vintage Glams" by Lauren Luke

I used to like her, a lot! I used to watch her when she wasn't even famous yet, then her videos became SO MUCH TALKING! That it annoyed me to the point were I had to unsubscribe. I hate when people are doing makeup tutorials and keep talking about their personal lives. Of course everyone has their own style, sadly her new one was not the style that I enjoy watching.
I think one of the reasons I bought this pallet was because I simply loved her. I actually began youtube because of Lauren Luke.
Let's get to the point here.


Overall I rate this pallet a 7 out of 10

• Pros
  The eyeshadow colors are GORGEOUS!
  You can do an entire face makeup with the pallet
  Super easy to blend
  I love love love the primer (when is fresh -see cons*)
  Has a nice sized mirror
  Not tested in animals
  Can go well in any skin tone
  The blush has a very rich matte color
  Lasts all day long
  Light weight

• Cons
  It looks cheap
  Since it is an "open" pallete, there is no way you can close the gel liner, the lipglosses, nor the eyeshadow primer
  -The gel liner dries SUPER fast (you can see from the pictures it was barely used before it was dry)
  -The lipglosses, after dried up, if you rub them enough they should "come back to life" but still not as creamy as before
  -The eyeshadow primer is very light weight when the pallet is new, after a while starts to get very very sticky and if you have oily lids, that's even worse.
  The lipgloss that comes with it is SUPER sticky, for some looks is a good thing, but you don't want to wear that everyday
  As a long term investment, I consider it expensive; because you only get to keep three eyeshadow and a blush, because the rest is not 100% good.

If there was the option of buying the items individually I would highly recommend buying the blush and eye shadows, also the primer if it was in an exclusive packing were it wouldn't dry or get extremely sticky.  

Now more of a break down of the products:

- The primer: What I like the most is that it comes in two tones, one for brightening up the makeup look and the other one is more of a skin toned primer for more of a smokey sexy eye look. Also it really helps the eyeshadow to stay in place. Honestly I do not even use NYX jumbo pencils when wearing the LL primer.
- The gel liner: I do not remember how well it worked. It dried really, I mean REALLY fast :(
- The lipgloss: It comes with 2 options a pink-ish and a more of a brown toned color. The colors are very pretty, and very wearable to all skin tones, it does not have any taste, and gives your lips a very nice tone that will last for a reasonable period of time
- The blush: I wish they would sell it separately from this pallet. The color is super rich and deep, it stays very well in the skin when wearing a face primer. Very pigmented
- The eyeshadow: It comes with 3 eyeshadows. One is very big, so you can use as a high lighter as well! Is very light and they have a sheen with a little bit of glitter on it. My favorite is the purple one. I am in love with her eyeshadows, they are rich, pigmented, blend super easily, and it lasts!

I haven't seen these pallets at Sephora anymore, is not even showing up on their website anymore. However you can find them at : Lauren Luke's website

They cost $37 now, before I think they were $34.50.

Another thing I noticed is that it hasn't been updated in a while, so I am not sure if she still keeping up with her makeup line or not.

Here are some pictures of swatches.

xoxo ♥